Thats Life

Well I've come to the conclusion that I'm not going to get anywhere in life. I'm never going to be successful, I'm never going to have a nice vehicle of my own, I'm never going to have anything. The only thing I actually own is my clothes. Life sucks.

Tonight

Sitting on my deck
Looking into the night's sky
The stars are out tonight
It's a clear sky
I see one bright star
And I think to myself
I bet its God looking down on us

No Cigarettes

Don't you just hate when you run out of cigarettes. Well, I ran out of cigarettes today & it sucks. I'm sitting here trying to put my mind on something else & not think about wanting a cigarette but boy is it hard. I'm thinking maybe I should go to sleep. That will do the trick. Ah, well, I'm going to drink a beer first.

Scion TC Tribute

Tortured Souls

The changing began,

As dooms scythe pierces

My darkened soul, my cascade

Of tears fall upon howling eyes

Stop! Stop!

We are the fallen ones

Our mind a destructive playground

Walk around the halls & you'll see the namesof the tortured souls

Could this be the antichrist, following us

We walk around with chains bound to our bodies

Like slaves commanded by Satan

Razor sharp knives pierce our bodies

As Satan commands us what to do like soldiers in the army

We've reached the darkest part of our tortured souls

There's a hole in our hearts that seeps from our chests

Bound and gagged, sliced and torn

We are tortured souls, living in this hell

When Satan demands we become obsessed and possessed

By our fears not to let him go

We are tortured souls living life in a manic aggression

We are weak human beings, brought to this earth

By Satan, he works through our eyes, we are his slaves

We are the tortured souls, we scream in pain

Hell crushing flames shine through the darkness

Satan's demons attack us with deadly demonic wrath

As we realize we have sinned, this is our punishment

We are tortured souls who look deep down in the black pits Of our hearts, delivering Satans sinister message of doom

We are tortured souls

Singing As A Profession

Well, I got the idea from this blog from my step-daughter Laura. Laura has got a great voice, she sings quite well. I told her she should start singing as a profession but she said she doesn't know how to get into that. So I've started doing some research on how one can start singing as a profession. To hear Laura singing check out her Myspace Karaoke profile.

The first web site that I found on my quest was a web site called Vocalist. This site seems to be a little helpful. Not too sure, I suppose it depends on each individual & what really they are looking for. Check out Vocalist. Another great site is WikiHow. For those of you who don't know what WikiHow is well, it's a web site that lets you know how to do practically anything. Check out the WikiHow web site on "How to Be a Singer." Another web site that tells you how to become a singer is "How To Become A Singer And Get Heard". Another web site that might help is How To Become A Singer and What To Do To Make It Happen. Another suggestion is creating a Myspace Band profile with you singing songs your page. Another web site which is much like WikiHow is eHow. On eHow they have an article called "How to Become a Singer/Songwriter".

Of course anyone can find information on Google on how to become a singer. Well, here is the search link on How To Become A Singer. Check out all the links that seem useful to you.

Thanks for reading. Have a great day.

Summer of 2009

Hello everyone. Well, summer is coming to a closing and it will start getting cold soon. I hate the cold. That is one thing I can't stand, is being cold. This summer has been a hot one. But I love the warm weather. There is nothing like sitting on the deck listening to the birds chirp & watching the squirrels run in the trees. Summer to me is a very peaceful time when you can relax & enjoy life. I'm sad to see it will be ending soon. As you all might know I am a photographer & this summer I've been able to take TONS of pictures of different places I've been, animals and many more things. This summer has been fun but at the same time I've been going through a bit of a depression also so at times I am down. For anyone that doesn't know, I graduated from Woodrow Wilson Rehabilitation Center this past March 2009 with a degree in Web Design & I have yet to find a job in Web Design. Sometimes I think maybe I am not qualified enough for the job which is the reason I was going to go back to school because if you work in the computer field you know that anything with computers changes every day and it's a career where you have to keep learning. You can't just take the knowledge you have and apply it, you have to keep on learning. So I'm thinking that I am going to go back to school sometime this coming year because I want further my education even more. I'm trying to better myself which is one of my New Years Resolutions.

This summer has been a good one and it has had its downfalls also. One good thing that happened this summer was we had a new addition to our family. My sister had a beautiful baby girl named Kaylee Grace Sluss. She was 7 pounds 12 ounces and 21 inches long. She is so adorable. I would show you a photo of her but if my sister saw this she would kill me. LoL. Kaylee was born on July 4th, 2009. What a great day to have a birthday. Let's see what else has happened. Hummm. I've had several job interviews and even gotten jobs but as you can see none of them worked out obviously because I am jobless right now other than having the job at Krisp Web Solutions which is paid based on commission. So basically right now I am making no money except for a few cents here and there.

One thing I have hated about the summer is the fact that I've gotten eaten up by mosquitoes. I swear they love biting my legs. I hate it. I probably should have worn bug spray or something this summer. That would have made them bite me less I'm sure. I want to share some pictures with you from the summer. Actually I will do a little slide show for you. Hope you enjoy.

"I'M WORKING ON THE SLIDE SHOWS SO WHEN I'M DONE WITH THEM I WILL FINISH THIS BLOG"

Hiring For An Office Assistant?

Okay so I've been looking for jobs recently because me waiting to see if I will get SSI & disability is taking forever so I figure why not get a real job. Okay so I go online to Craigslist because that is how I like to look for jobs, online that is. It beats picking up a paper and finding a job because lately with the way the economy is there are little job listing in the newspaper. So I'm on Craigslist earlier and click on an ad that is titled "Office Assistant". Check out the ad below.

So I read the ad and I'm thinking hey this is something I can do. I'm qualified for this position so I send an e-mail with no body in the e-mail just my resume. I checked my e-mail a little bit ago to find that I've gotten a response from the ad. Well, here is what the response was.

WHAT? Wait, I thought this position was for an Office Assistant? Hummm. Seems like this is false advertisement. WTF. I have been scammed. Damn, why did I waste my time? I don't know. I should have known that most people who post ads on Craigslist are really posting false advertisements on there. Okay so instead of deleting the e-mail I decide to write back. I try to be nice & polite when doing so. Here is my response back to her after finding out that the position wasn't for an Office Assistant.


Okay so my advice to everyone out there is those ads you may see under the jobs section of Craigslist may not be what they appear. I apparently have learned that fact. Of course this isn't the first time I have realized that fact but of course I continue to reply to those ads in hopes that the ad is for a REAL job. Oh well, hell, you live & you learn & than move on.

Okay I am really going to go to bed now. Starting to get tired. This is about the time I normally go to sleep anyway. Good night all I hope you have sweet dreams.

Michael Jackson

First of all I would like to say, I know I said I was going to bed but well. I can't sleep and second of all I know I said I was going to post the next blog on how to make money online but I'm not in the mood to do that blog right now so that will be a couple blogs later. So I was just on the Yahoo web site and saw something on there about Michael Jackson. I think it said that there was going to be a Michael Jackson movie or something. Well, that got me to thinking. You know, Michael Jackson was a great performer, a wonderful father, well loved by mostly all people. He was famous, he was in the news a lot which brings me to my next point. It seems to me, now if I am wrong on this let me know but it seems that Michael Jackson is getting a LOT of press since his death. It seems like he is getting more press now than when he was alive. Would anyone agree with me on that? I mean there is a movie or something coming out about him, new things are being revealed about him oh and even check this out. I've been hearing about some kind of video that shows Michael Jackson's ghost. Check it out here. "Michael Jackson Ghost? During CNN Larry King Interview with Jermaine Jackson." It appears to me that even after Michael's death he still wants to be in the limelight. Do you believe it was really his ghost? Let me know by leaving me a comment, an e-mail or a video response.

Rantings of an insomniac

Well I've decided to turn over a new leaf. Life is an adventure even though there are many obstacles in the way at times. I've been going through a bit of a depression in the past couple months and I'm trying to be happier and think positive even though I've lived my whole life in negativity. When I was younger I received a lot of positivity from my mother but not so much from my father. That's just how I lived my life. But I'm trying to change all that. I just graduated from Woodrow Wilson Rehabilitation Center this past March 2009 with a degree in Web Design. I have yet to get a job in Web Design. I currently am working for Krisp Web Solutions which is based in Harrisonburg, VA but my job isn't doing web sites. My job is to call people or talk to people in person and get them as a customer for our company. When I call people I feel like a telemarketer and I think the people on the other end of the phone think I am a telemarketer also. That's not a very appealing part of the job. I was excited when I thought I got my first customer but to my dismay the guy didn't become a customer. In fact the guy told me to e-mail him information about our company and he never e-mailed me back. It's a job but not exactly. The job is paid based on commission and so far I'm not making any money at all. I think it's time for a REAL job. Even though this job seems real. I haven't been working as much with the job as I should be because I kind of got disappointed at the fact that I wasn't getting any customers but I'm not going to get customers if I don't try. I was calling restaurants and my boss suggested I try churches next so I'm going to go with that. I'll keep you updated on how that goes.

Here lately my depression has gotten a little worse and I've just been sitting at home on the internet. I've started trying those work at home things you seen online and tried out some of the web sites that claim to help you make money online. So far it's not going as good as I thought it would. Let's see, the only sites I have made any money on at all are YouData, which is a site where you have what they call a MeFile and in your MeFile you fill it out with your interests and so forth and so on. I've made $.92 cents off of that. YouData deposited the $.92 cents into my PayPal account. Another site I have made money from is Adf.ly, which is a site where you can shorten a URL/link. When you shorten the URL/link you can post the link into your blog, your Twitter, or any other site you choose. When you post the link and someone clicks on it, you get money for them clicking on the site. I can't remember exactly how much you get per click but I've made money from that site. So far I've made only $.17 cents from that site. Of course I haven't checked in a couple hours so that is how much I have made so far according to a couple hours ago. Let's check now to see what my current amount of money made is shall we. Wow. The amount of money I have made total on Adf.ly is now at $.20 cents. To make money on that site I have learned you have to post links for sites that will grab someone's attention. For instance the links that have had the most attention on my account are: My Personal Web Site; the video "I Am No Different Than You Are. GLBT ( Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, Transgender)" from OMFGitsJUSTIN which is a great video about people who are bi-sexual and basically Justin let's all the viewers on YouTube know that just because he is bi-sexual that he is no different than anyone else, straight or not. You will have to check out his YouTube channel. He is very funny, he will entertain you for sure. And the third link that gets a lot of clicks on my Adf.ly account is a YouTube video about Homophobia. It was an experiment on Homophobia. So this is a video on homophobia on YouTube. Check it out. BTW, if you click on any of the links and they look like they are SPAM I assure they are not. That's just part of Adf.ly. All you got to do is click at the top right corner where it says skip ad. Than it will take you to the site I am trying to show you. So those are the three links that get me the most clicks. Let's see what the stats are on those. In first place we have the video from OMFGitsJUSTIN with 81 clicks. In second place we have my personal web site with 54 clicks and in third place we have the video on the experiment on homophobia with 43 clicks. Check out Adf.ly if you would like to make money. I have tried other sites like PeopleString but I'm not having much success trying to get people to sign up on that. What PeopleString is basically is its like a social network site in a way. You get your friends to join PeopleString and you can make money when your friends sign up. You can even make money with PeopleString by reading e-mails. The reading e-mails part I haven't done yet because when you sign up with PeopleString they send you some kind of postcard and you have to wait for it to come in the mail before you can start getting money to read your e-mail. It's been 2 weeks and I have yet to receive the postcard but I do assure you that it does come in the mail because my friend Scott is the one that told me about it and he said he has received his postcard.

Well, it's off to bed for me. I'm getting tired. So goodnight and sweet dreams to all. Also a big shout out to my wife Deborah. I love you!

P.S. - My next blog will be about making money online & different web sites you can use to do so.

The Westboro Baptist Church

As you all might know I am a YouTubber. I am subscribed to the OMFGitsjustin YouTube channel. Justin has three videos on there of protesters from the Westboro Baptist Church. If you are GLBT than I'm sure you know who they are. First I would like to say, what is wrong with those people? They say we aren't teaching our children the truth because we aren't teaching them whats in the bible. Okay so they are teaching their children to hate everyone? Does that make sense to you? It doesn't to me. And another thing I want to know. Did God tell them that he hates everyone? I had never heard that God hates everyone until tonight when I heard it out of their mouths. That is absurd. I mean come on now, if God hated everyone than why would he create them? Doesn't make sense to me. And their website is WWW.godhatesfags.com and until tonight I thought that just meant that God supposedly just hated GLBT people. Apparently according to one of the members from Westboro, anyone can be a "fag" which is known as a bundle of sticks and has some reference to going to hell. Those people look like idiots, they are foolish, they are much hated by many many people. I mean what I want to know is why are they telling everyone that God hates everyone? Wouldn't that mean that God hates them too? So if God hates everyone and that would include them than why are they out there holding signs speaking up for God if he hates them? Does that make sense? Not to me. Maybe they are just bored. I wonder what they do for a living. Maybe they just go around the country preaching the fact that God supposedly hates everyone. On another note, tonight is the first time I have ever heard of President Obama being referred to as the Antichrist. I wonder why they consider him the Antichrist. Humm. That is a good question.

Well, I checked out their website and I found that they are preaching hate really. It seems like they are a cult or something. I mean teaching hate and prejudice. In my honest opinion, I think they are the Antichrist. I mean come on, really. Where have you ever heard that God preached about hating others? I've never heard of it until now. What I've been told by my parents and what I've read in the bible is that God loved all. God preached about love and taught love among his children.

After watching the video I would really love to go to one of there protests or pickets as they call it. I'm going to have to pick up my bible and find in there where it says God hates fags. I'll probably be looking forever because I'm pretty sure it doesn't say that in there anywhere.

What I want to know is what are your thoughts on Westboro Baptist Church and do you agree with what they are teaching? Send me a comment, e-mail, a video response, anything. Let me know what you think.

~Bean~

Zeus

I feel bad that Zeus is in the room with dad and that he can't come here in my living room but I have my cat Scrappy out here and Zeus and Scrappy don't get along. I wish there was a way that I could make Scrappy and Zeus get a long but Zeus is such a big pitbull and he likes to intimidate the cat. I don't think they will ever get along. Scrappy ain't scared of Zeus though. Scrappy holds his own and chases right after the dog. Sometimes Zeus is scared of the cat. Lol.

My mood today

I feel very moody and cranky today. I woke up this morning and yep, it's that time of the month. All I feel like doing is sleeping. I've been taking Tylenol all day but you know how that goes. Tylenol eventually wears off. God the cramps. I'm very bitchy today. I'm in one of these moods where I want to be left alone. I'm sorry to all my friends if I have been bitchy or moody today towards you. I just feel blah.