Soul Searching

I don't know what's been wrong with me lately. I don't really know how to describe how I have been feeling. But, I do know I need to do some soul searching and some personal development. I have been doing so much lately with my 2 jobs and haven't really taken the time to focus on me. So I am going to take some time to focus on me and working on bettering myself. I will take this time to learn and grow. My self esteem or self confidence has gone down a bit since I have become a Promoter for Visalus. I am not as confident as I once used to be. And one of my problems is that I compare myself to others which I need to stop doing. I am me, not like anyone else. Yep so I am going to work on me. I have become lost really, yeah lost. 

Thoughts

Here lately I have been wondering what my purpose in life is. What I am born to do and be. I'm not finding answers. I have been a little emotional lately. It's mostly because the way people treat me. You can't yell at me and be mean one minute and then hours later be nice to me like nothing happened and expect for me to be all smiles and happy like nothing happened because I don't forget it. And most likely I am still thinking about it and wondering what I did wrong and what I did to deserve such treatment. Sometimes I think maybe I am a bad person. These past couple days I have been feeling like I just can't do anything right. Seems like everything I do is wrong. I wonder to myself, why does travertine treat me the way they do, what did I do to make them treat me that way and how I can fix it. Then that makes me wonder what is wrong with myself and how I can change myself so others won't treat me the way they do. I start my day off positive and in a good mood and ready to get things done and accomplished and as the day goes on that all changes. I have good days and I have bad days. Having bipolar sucks. On bad days I have headaches and I'm irritable and get frustrated with myself and all I want to do is go to sleep and wait to start the next day over on a fresh clean slate with a positive attitude and in a good mood. Sometimes I wonder why people don't want to see me happy. I wonder if they like seeing me unhappy, and sad, and upset, and almost to the point of tears from frustration and hate for myself. Life isn't easy, I am just trying to survive and make it in this world like everyone else. But why must others try to bring me down and hurt me so, as if I have no feelings and if I do they don't matter. I want to find my purpose in life but at this point I don't really think I have a purpose in life. I am just here, just walking among others trying to survive, trying to blend in, not really accomplishing anything, just trying to make it even though I keep getting knocked down yet I still keep getting back up. But how many times will I keep getting back up before I just decide to give up all together? Who knows. I just want better days. I just want to be happy. I just want to be respected. I just want to feel like I have a purpose in life. Oh how I hope better days are to come. I shall pray to God for better days ahead. I don't know how much longer I can "Just survive". 

My views on twitter

Without inspiration the best powers of the mind remain dormant. There is a fuel in us which needs to be ignited with sparks. - Edward Corrigan

Trying to get in the dog's inside but the neighbor's are out in their po and my dogs are barking at their dog. All three of regent are barking and totally ignoring me. I shall just sit here I suppose until they are ready to come in. They never listen to me when the dog next door is out. I love them with all my heart though. They're my babies. 

Network marketing

One mistake I am now learning from is not to SPAM people. Well, i am learning from a lot of mistakes. I have been doing that and it doesn't really work. People don't want to be spammed. I have been going about it the wrong way. I thought I had already learned that and was going to change that but went back to doing it. Surprised people haven't I friended me by now. It only worked a couple times, I had 4 customers sign up. That's a small number. So obviously that method isn't working. I need a new method to try. Like I said before or maybe I have, I am new to Network Marketing, started at the beginning of April so I am learning what works and what doesn't. So far I haven't really learned what works but I have learned that spamming doesn't work, not really. I have started networking with a bunch of other Network Marketers on Facebook and they seem to have great advice. One piece of advice that one of them said was don't add a friend to Facebook and immediately pitch your business. Get to know them first and let them get comfortable with you and then you can do that. I didn't do that but I won't make that mistake again. I am new to this and well I just want to be successful. I want to the best. 

90 Day Challenge

For all those who have not seen our video yet then here it is. This is the Body By Vi overview video. I recommend you watch it if you're interested in losing weight, getting healthier, getting for, building muscle or just want to live a healthier lifestyle. http://visalus.com/body-by-vi-overview-presentation

If you're interested after watching the video then send me an email at beanad@myvi.net

#BodyByVi #weight-loss #fitness #health #healthy #visalus #project10challenge #project10kids #90daychallenge #crushobesity

Check it out

For all those who have not seen our video yet then here it is. This is the Body By Vi overview video. I recommend you watch it if you're interested in losing weight, getting healthier, getting for, building muscle or just want to live a healthier lifestyle. http://visalus.com/body-by-vi-overview-presentation

If you're interested after watching the video then send me an email at beanad@myvi.net