Monday, May 28, 2007

Confessions Of A Poet

Life is not what I would like it to be. Life right now is annoying. I want to cry. I really do. I'm tired of being poor, I'm tired of being broke. I'm tired of doing without so Walter won't do without. I'm tired of giving him food that I'm going to eat and go without so he won't get hungry. I don't understand it. I don't understand how I can be so nice and so sweet and so caring and only Sara gives it back to me. Walter is hungry, yeah so I give him my food. Is this how it is going to be for the rest of my life? Me going without so he doesn't have to go without? No, I don't want it to be like that. I need to hurry up and finish school so I can actually have a career and then move out. I'm not taking care of Walter for the rest of his life. He doesn't give a fuck about me at all. Because if he did he would act like it. He used to care. He used to even act like he cared. I'm not his mother, I'm not his wife, I'm his best friend. But there is a point when you just can't take it anymore. There is a point where you push the friendship over the edge. I've been pushed over the edge. Yes, I live here and don't pay any bills at all. But what do I really use? I use the shower every once in a while. I use the electric every once in awhile. I don't know. What is wrong with me that I feel this way? I just feel like I am being used. I come home yesterday and all the milk has been drank, all the Pepsi has been drank, all the Dr. Pepper has been drank, and of course he drank all of his Diet Pepsi. Why are people so fucking selfish? Why do people just suddenly turn into selfish people and only care about themselves? I don't get it. I try hard to help other people. Anyways. I'm going to end this.

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