Thoughts

My girlfriend cried tonight in front of me & her mom & dad...so i'm not writing this for anyone else. I'm writing this for myself. So i will know my thoughts. That way i can remember them. So, my baby is about to sing to me. I'm so in love with her. Did i mention that? Her mom wanted her to sing so she started to sing. Now she's singing. Kareoke. Lol. She is a good singer. She is so sweet. I'm so in love with her, I think I already mentioned that. She makes me so happy. I got out of school, went home, then i went to her house. Spent a little time with her. Was going to do homework for my other school, but yeah, i have ADHD, and i was going over her house so i decided fuck my homework. I can't fucking concentrate anyway. If I was back on my ADHD medicine then I would be ok. But since I am loser and I don't have a job, I can quite get medicine, because once again to clarify this, since I'm a loser and don't have a job, I don't have health insurance. And since my mental age, is that of a teenager, well I can't quite function. Sometimes I hate being stupid. It really sucks. I hate being immature. I hate being me sometimes. A lot of the time actually. I hate it. I can't sleep because I have no sleeping pills left because I don't got no money, no job, i suck. I'm such a loser. I wish things were different. Everyone thinks I'm this really self confident person and shit like that, but I'm not. I'm really not. I may seem that way on the outside. But really, on the inside, I'm this insecure, scared, little boi. I don't know what I would do without my parents. I don't even want to think about that. Because when I do, it scares me, and it makes me just want to cry. I hate my life sometimes. Maybe I'll go on food stamps since I don't have a job. Because I am a fucking bum. I guess that is all I'll ever be. I guess I'm like Ronnie now. Don't got a job and just bum on other people. Even he has a job now. Anyways, I am frustrated with myself right now so I am going to end this blog. That is all for now. Goodnight. I'm going to try to go to sleep now. Goodnight to all, and sweet dreams. Baby if you read this, I love you. I love you so much. Don't ever fucking forget that.
~homie G~