Saturday, November 5, 2011
What's Been Going On
Me & Jen are still together, its been almost a year (25 Dec 2010 - Present). I'm not sure if I mentioned that I have a job but yes I'm back working. I stopped working in 2007 because I started school & graduated in Web Design from school, but I'm back in the work field now & loving it. I like to work, it gives me something to do & I like making money, & it helps me feel independent. I've been at my job almost 3 months but for the life of me I cannot remember the month I started working there, it was during the summer I do remember that much. So I've just been working. I started off working 40 hours a week but then a guy was hired for 3rd shift so I started working 32 hours a week & started working mostly 2nd shift. Then at one point I was working some on my days off which I didn't mind, more money for me & more hours. Now I'm working 32 hours with 3 days off, which I don't mind. So once again, I'm back in the work world & loving it. Working gives me a sense of independence which I like. I've been doing good, however, the Winter is fast approaching & unfortunately I have Seasonal Depression yet it hasn't hit me yet or its already hit me & isn't as bad as it has been in the past. I still go to the Veteran's Hospital in Salem but now I see a psychiatrist at the new Staunton Veteran's Clinic that just opened which I don't mind because the dude I was seeing in Salem wasn't even a real shrink, he was like an intern or something like that & he left the hospital because his time was up. I think he was doing his residency or something like that. I have a woman shrink now & she seems okay but I've only seen her once so far but she seems okay. Finally I'm on Anxiety medicine that I've heard of & that works. Whatever the hell that shrink in Salem put me on didn't work, I don't even remember the name of it, I had never heard of it before. However, I haven't had to take any Anxiety medicine. I did have to get Jen to bring me my medicine to work a week ago, don't know if I had a panic attack or what, who knows, I don't. All I know is that I needed my Anxiety medicine & thankfully my new shrink put me on something that works & I took one when Jen brought them to me & I felt better.
It snowed here not long ago, it was near the end of October 2011. It snowed in the evening started at 5pm & continued snowing the whole night into the next morning, so almost 2 days straight. It didn't stop snowing. I drove my truck to work that night, it was on a Friday I think or a Saturday, I know it was a weekend that I worked 3rd shift. I never drive my truck to work because Jen's car is better on gas but I am glad that I drove my truck to work because that morning that I got off work around 7:30a it was sleeting & there were so many accidents that morning. Me & Jen happened to go to my parent's house that morning after I got off work & we went in my truck & we saw SUV's that had ran off the road & were in the ditch & 4 Wheel Drive trucks in the ditch. And some of my customers told me about other accidents that had happened. I didn't have to kick the 4 Wheel Drive on but I drove slow, people were driving normal speed past me, fucking idiots, that's how accidents are caused. People think they can drive normal speed & drive fast in bad weather, some of those people are the ones who have accidents. However, one of the people who we saw that had an accident & had ran into the ditch was not speeding, that woman had been going way under the speed limit. She must have hit a patch of ice or something & her vehicle went spinning & into the ditch she ended up.
Anyways, enough about snow, LOL. I so do not want anymore snow, not now anyway. That's what Christmas is for, snow can come around that time. I worked Halloween night, 2nd shift & I ended up working part of 3rd shift too. I worked 4pm to 4am that night, so a 12 hour shift, which I don't mind because I'm used to working 12 hours. Me & Cody happened to be in the store a little after 12:30am on Halloween night & we heard a strange noise which came from the area where the coffee machine was & it sounded like an old wooden oak desk scrapping against the floor, now we were in mid conversation when we heard the noise & we both stopped talking & looked at each other like WTF. A few minutes after that David came back & we told him about it & we looked in the office where the desk was & it hadn't moved, plus that desk isn't wooden anyway & also the noise didn't even come from the office. Either way, we heard the noise & no I'm not crazy because I'm not the only one that heard it, so its not like I was hearing stuff that no one else heard. Later on the three of us were talking & we continued to hear various noises. They had left & I was in the store by myself & I heard the door open as if someone was getting a drink from the cooler & I saw the cooler door closing, I went back to check it out & the door wasn't closed all the way. I thought to myself, WTF & closed it & went on about what I was doing. All in all, Halloween night at work was crazy LOL. I've heard that the store is haunted & I'm not the only one who's heard noises & had things happen that couldn't be explained. You can believe it or not, but if you go in the during the night you can see for yourself, if you hear an unexplained noise that you can make up your own mind whether its haunted or not.
Today is now Saturday & surprisingly I'm off work & I'm also off Sunday which isn't out of the ordinary because I've been off on Sundays for the past Month really, but hey I'm not complaining about being off, its nice actually. I'm starting to get tired so I'm going to change & lay down & hopefully I will quickly fall asleep. Yall have a good night. I will write more tomorrow. This is for now. Take care ~Bean~
Thursday, September 22, 2011
Engaged, My Relationship, My love For Jen & How We Met Etc
Anyways, I'm done now ranting & rambling & writing a book & done writing a novel. I'm through. The End!!!
Thursday, August 18, 2011
Great-Grandmother Killed Over Video Game
This is absolutely ridiculous. What is wrong with kids these days? Are the parents to blame for the way these kids actions? Seems to me that these kids are apparently not being raised right or if the parents of these kids are trying to raise their children right then it could be that these are rebellious children/teens that have estrayed & are too hard to handle. Hey I do have to give some parents credit, they really do try to raise their kids right yet their children go down the wrong path. But still most people are going to first blame the parents whether its their faults or not. I can't believe this 15-year-old is accused of killing his great-grandmother. Well, let me rephrase what I just said. I CAN believe that this 15-year-old is accused of killing his great-grandmother over a video game. I just can't believe that this 15-year-old would actually kill his great-grandmother over a video game. This just goes to show how today's youth is. One guy kills a kitten over a video game & now a 15-year-old is killing his great-grandmother over a video game. Is there something we're missing here? Could video games to be blamed for what is happening here? I wonder. I DID have that thought in my head, it DID cross my mind. What has happened to today's youth? Why have today's youth resulted in murder over a video game? And what kind of video games are these kids murdering over? Could they be playing a violent game? I ask that question surprisingly because not normally would I blame anything on a "violent" video game but could this really be what is to blame? Or are video games not to blame for these murders and only these children are the ones to blame? I would like someone to give me their opinion of what they think it is. I used to never think that a violent video game could be to blame but now I am starting to change the way I am thinking. I really want to know what video games these 2 children were playing that resulted in them committing murder. Its good that this 15-year-old will stand trial as an adult because really that is how he should stand trial. Obviously since he is a 15-year-old he clearly knew what he was doing & he is old enough to think for himself & make his own decisions. Definitely a good thing that he will stand trial as an adult because that is how he should stand trial because he has to learn a lesson. Then again, maybe he is too young right now to learn a lesson. I can't say that I think he didn't know what he was doing because he is 15 years old and clearly he knew what he was doing because is old enough to know right from wrong and obviously this was wrong but he did it anyway. I haven't read the rest of this news story only the first part so it should be interesting to see what the rest of the news story has to say.
According to the news story, a family friend said the teen was angry that he was told to stop playing the video game, Halo. Now I used to be a huge video gamer when I was in my early 20's but now that I'm 30 I don't play much video games but if I am correct, isn't Halo a violent game? I think I will Google the video game Halo real quick to see what type of video game this is. This is what I found when I searched for what the game Halo was all about. It said the Halo series has been praised as being amongst the best first-person shooters on a video game console. Halo being amongst the best first-person shooters to me sounds like Halo is clearly a first-person shooting game. Hence, its one person playing the game & that player is shooting hence, killing. So basically its a killing game where you shoot an alien, a person etc. & kill them. Yeah, okay so with that said, I do stand with what I said earlier when I said my opinion of violent video games possibly being a factor in these children & teens behavior. First of all, this 15-year-old teen was angry that he was told to stop playing the video game. Okay so he was angry that he was told to stop playing it but this didn't mean that he had to resort to violence much less murder. That right there makes me think this teen had anger issues apparently. I know many teens are angry & rebellious at that age but killing your great-grandmother because you've become angry because you were told to turn the video game off? That's no excuse if you ask me. Clearly this teen should have been seeking psychiatric treatment for anger issues & maybe other issues. Also, he didn't just murder his great-grandmother which is really the worst of it, he also used a 34 to 36 inch sword to cut his grandmother. Now once again, he was told to turn off the video game Halo & this made the teen become angry & he resulted to violence by cutting his grandmother & he resulted to murder by killing his great-grandmother. Does anyone else see what is wrong with this situation? I wonder if this could have been prevented? I wonder if there were warning signs that something like this was going to happen. In most cases that you've heard about over the years in the news, there has been warning signs just no one paid close enough attention to those warning signs. Like I said before, my opinion that these violent games can be a factor as to why a child or teen acts the way they do still stands. I still agree that they could be a contributing factor to the behavior of these children & teens. Its just like the Columbine Massacre, where playing violent video games were to blame & listening to a certain kind of music was to blame. I don't blame music in this particular situation but I do blame the game Halo which from what I read sounds to be a violent video game in which you murder/kill/shoot something, probably someone, I do feel that the video game might be party blamed for the way the teen acted. Its like this, a teen plays a game like this over & over & plays it constantly & all the time & they become wrapped up in it & there brain starts thinking a certain way. They start thinking as if they are a part of the video game or in the video game. Does that make any sense? I mean this is not what I am saying that I think, but I am trying to make sense of all this. And I'm guessing this is the scenario if the video game Halo is to blame. I mean if video games are to blame for these teens & children's behavior then well, I'm trying to make sense of it & figure it all out. I wonder if any studies have actually shown that video games could be a contributing factor in a situation like this. Normally I wouldn't be one to blame a violent video game in fact in 2000 when music & video games were blamed for what happened at Columbine I just really laughed it off & said that it was crap because those two were not to blame but I am really starting to wonder if they really might be to blame. I mean really we don't know what goes on in these kids minds, so we can't really say or not & even if you asked one of these kids that question I'm not even sure they would give you the answer that you're looking for. Okay, so there is more to the news story so I will read on.
Okay so the next sentence in the news story stated that this attack marks the third time that deputies have encountered the teen. So this tells you right here that yes there were warning signs & no this wasn't the first incident concerning this teen. So the deputies knew already about this teen's behavior because this was not the first time that the deputies had encountered the teen but this was actually the third time. I hate to say it but, they always say third time is a charm, or 3 strikes & you're out. According to Sheriff Phil Miller, on two previous occasions, the teen was sent to a hospital to be mentally evaluated & then turned over to Juvenile Justice. But both times, Miller says, the boy was released, despite his violent history. Well, you know really all I got to say about that is whoever it is that released the boy is the one at fault. So they DID know of his violent history and he WAS sent to a hospital to be mentally evaluated, yet nothing was done after he was mentally evaluated & then he was turned over to Juvenile Justice but both times the boy was released even though they knew about his violent history. So maybe my opinion has changed about the violent video game maybe contributing to his behavior but maybe not. I think I still do believe that the video game possibly had something to do with his behavior or it just added to his violent behavior. Really if a violent person plays a violent game then that is only going to make that person worse & more violent in my opinion. I am just in shock right now that there were actually 2 incidents before this one & even though he was mentally evaluated & sent to Juvenile Justice that he was just released. YEP, I blame whoever it was that let this boy go. OBVIOUSLY there had been signs that he was violent & yet they did nothing about it or either ignored the warning signs. YES, I do believe now that this tragic incident definitely could have been prevented yet it wasn't prevented. You would think after the Columbine Massacre & the many events that followed that by teens across the nation that people would have started paying closer attention to teens & the way they act & their violent behaviors. All I can do is shake my head & really point fingers. I mean this is definitely a situation to point fingers because fingers do need to be pointed & the responsible individuals need to take blame for not preventing this from happening. Its ridiculous that this happened & that they boy was released even after they need about his past. I'm just shocked & can't believe this happened because it so could have been prevented. And with this happening would this cause other responsible people to pay closer attention to violent teens like this? I doubt it. I don't think this is going to make the people who are responsible start paying attention to these teens, I just don't think this is going to make them start paying attention because if something like this would make them start paying attention then for God's Sake the Columbine Massacre that happened in 2000 would have been the cause for these responsible people to open their eyes & start paying attention but look, years later & more incidents like this are still happening even though all the warning signs were there right in front of them. I do believe there is more to the news story, so let's read on shall we.
Sheriff Miller said that it seemed like to him that somebody may not be doing what they could do, or may be dropping the ball somewhere in the system. And I would totally have to agree with Sheriff Miller, somebody just may not be but they ARE NOT doing what they could be & what they should be doing. They are NOT doing their job because if they were this incident would have been prevented & it would have never happened & this 15-year-old teen's great-grandmother would still be alive today.Sheriff Miller said that someone else was recently killed by a mentally ill person who slipped through the cracks. And these mentally ill people apparently keep slipping through the cracks & I wonder & have to ask, how many more will slip through the cracks before something is done about this? I bet no one can answer that question. Sheriff Miller said someone else was killed by a mental ill person that had slipped through the cracks & on July 22nd, a deputy shot a man who was described as schizophrenic after the he used a knife to kill a man. So this is NOT the ONLY incident where a mentally ill person slipped through the cracks as Sheriff Miller said. Yet another example that this teen was NOT the only one whose warning signs were ignored as you see because this man described as schizophrenic killed a man even though the warning signs were there. Why is the warning signs there but the people responsible are ignoring them? What is wrong with these people? So many warning signs were there & even the teen's mother cried out for help many, many times to many, many different places & obviously didn't get the help she asked for. It is clear her cries for help went unheard because if her cries for help had been heard then this incident would have NEVER taken place. How much longer does tragic incidents like this have to go on before people start paying attention & doing what needs to be done to prevent incidents like this?
Friday, June 3, 2011
Tuesday, May 24, 2011
May 24th More Madness Of An Bipolar Schizophrenic Insomniac
I still have not been to sleep yet. I didn’t go to sleep last night & was up all day today & I am still up now & have not gone to sleep yet tonight and I will probably be up all night too. I just don’t feel like going to sleep. I do have sleeping pills that my doctor prescribed me to help me sleep though, but I just don’t want to take them tonight & didn’t want to take them last night. I do take them sometimes though, because sometimes I just really do feel like going to sleep that way all the madness can stop in my brain. When the really crazy madness starts in my brain I go to sleep. And I am talking about the really crazy madness that gets to the point where it irritates me & aggravates me & drives me crazy, yeah that really crazy madness. When it gets like that I’m like okay leave me alone because I am going to sleep because I have to go to sleep to stop the crazy madness. LOL. Yep yep. It has gotten like that a couple times in the past two weeks. And if you are asking, yes I have been taking my medicine. Shit, I know I need my medicine and trust me I do want to take it. Sometimes however I do forget to take it. But I don’t forget for long that I have forgotten to take it because I can tell that I have forgotten to take it & I am quick to take it to make everything much much better.
Come to the dark side.. we have cookies! Welcome to the dark side, are you surprised we lied about having cookies? Yeah, I don't give out cookies. I just give out a dose of craziness, madness, pure and total insaneness, you are sure to lose your mind after you have come to my dark side.
Jen L Graves would you like to come to the dark side? If I said we had cookies on the dark side I would be lying. But you are sure to get a dose of crazy, pure insane, madness. You come to the dark side & you will be eventually humming & singing along with the rest of us to the song "Take Me Away To The Funny Farm".
is not going into the enchanted forest with the pink fairies and the neon green polka dot monkeys that are searching for the unicorns because I will be down in the fiery pits of hell trying to take over & most likely ending up slaughtering Satan with a machete or a pitchfork or an ax or the biggest damn knife I can find. Anyone want to come? You can help me take over Hell.
Damnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn, don't EVER piss off my girlfriend, that would be a big mistake & might possibly lead to your death LOL....my girlfriend Jen L Gravesjust went the hell off on PayPal in an email, she told them EXACTLY what the hell she thought. They made the mistake of pissing her off when she's in a bad mood & has not had any sleep in days. I'm proud of her.
OK, let me get something straight here ... You're calling me crazy, mentally challenged, fruit loop, completely mad, mentally unstable, insane, off my rocker, wacko, and mentally unbalanced like it's a BAD THING?
is sitting in a corner watching my imaginary friends fight the shadows on the wall, they are fighting over which Marilyn Manson song gets played next & I do believe my imaginary friends won cos they've stabbed to death the shadows on the wall because blood is dripping down the wall. Ohhhh how exciting, gotta love a little blood & gore every now & then.
Okay call me crazy, mentally unstable, insane, mad, mentally challenged, off my rocker, & mentally unbalanced if you want but if you don't stop I'm going to send the dead people that I see & my imaginary friends after you to attack you. They will get you for sure. You SHOULD be scared, you will be scared after they get a hold of you!!
For all the people who like to poke me, I have currently lost my mind & I have gone to look for it. I am not sure when I will be back or if I will be back ever. Keep on poking me but I won't be here to poke you back. So sorry. Have currently lost my mind & have to go look for it, not sure if I will ever find it but it will be an adventure looking for it.
Ahhhhh cat hair every where. My hands are sweating & the cat hair is sticking to my damn hands. Ahhh, I'm going to go crazy. Ugh, its going to get on my face & then I will start twitching & itching. I'll try to ignore it right now. OMG, so many pussies every where, hair is uh flying every where. Oh well, I have already gone crazy, it will just make me crazier. LOL.
Someone suggested next time you're in Walmart wear a plastic crown & get someone to push you around in a cart & wave but you would totally look like a dumbass if you did that, I suggest go to the electronics & set all the clocks alarm to a certain time & then go hide & wait for them all to go off at once & listen to loud chiming sound & watch the chaos as the salesperson tries to get them all turned off. LMFAO.
Christy Rockwell Leath You know, I had totally forgotten that you were on my friend's list still because I hadn't seen any updates in my news feed from you & hadn't seen you make any comments or pokes or likes from you, you were like hiding as if you had disappeared. And then all of a sudden out of nowhere you appear. LOL.
I'll tell you like I told Kathryn Spivey. I'm crazy. Why would I want to be normal? That is just no fun & there is no excitement in life to being normal. I tried being normal once but it didn't work out so well for me. So I decided to go back to being crazy. Ever since then life has been pretty exciting & a whole lot less boring then being normal was.
I love you Jen L Graves, and I know you love me even though I am a crazy, insane, bipolar, schizophrenic insomniac. LOL. But, we fit together so perfectly.
I'm sane enough to know the consequences but insane enough to do it!
I have Adhd, Schizophrenia, Borderline personality disorder, Obsessive–compulsive disorder, Bipolar disorder, and Paranoid schizophrenia. Its not like I'm going to hide it. Its sometimes hard to hide anyway. Everyone already thinks I am crazy & insane & yet most people still seem to love me anyway. LOL.
people always ask me "Do you know what you are" & I always say "Yep, I'm crazy, funny, with a pinch of insane & just happen to have Adhd, Schizophrenia,Borderline personality disorder, Obsessive–compulsive disorder, Bipolar disorder, and Paranoid schizophrenia but everyone loves me anyway"
4 out of 5 voices are telling me to do it. The other one is yelling at me in German! Just because my dad was born in Ulm, Germany does not mean that I can speak German or understand German. Damn you voice, speak in ENGLISH!!!
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAHAHAHAAHAHHAAHAHHAH AAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH AHAHHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAH and for your information i am only a little crazy and insane
That awkward moment when you're sitting in your toilet cubical minding your own business and BAM the dead people & your imaginary friends busts in trying to sell you weed...
Tell me why one of the suggestions on the right side of the screen that is "related to my post" said pink fairies? Hum, I don't ever recall writing anything about pink fairies, ever. They seriously have the "Related To Your Post" words messed up. Never would I write about pink fairies. Idiots.
Facebook must be messed up tonight. It said I had one new message in my inbox & I went to it & there was no new messages in my inbox. Facebook needs to stop lying to me. LOL. I don't have any new messages. Maybe they are trying to make me think I am going crazy. Hum, yeah, that is a good possibility.
HAHA. I just have to LMFAO because that last status I posted was about Facebook messing up. However, it now says on the right side of the screen "Related To Your Post" is Coca-Cola & Justin Bieber. Seriously, re-read my message, I didn't mention either one in that status message. Facebooks words that are related to my post is definitely wrong.
I'm that crazy lesbian that will drive u insane ...but you will love every minute of it!!!
I love "me" so much, my doctor gave me a nice jacket that helps me hug myself!
well yesterday was another hard day, my imaginary friends were running with scissors towards the dead people that I see whom were running towards my imaginary friends with machetes, & the voices in my head where fighting with themselves & I just couldn't get no peace & quiet, & I'm still missing my helmet & crayons
I'm going to start listening to the voices in my head. Be afraid. Be very afraid. lol
They say that when you dream about somebody, they went to sleep thinking about you. Quick! everybody think about me and we will have a big party in my dreams!!
One of the voices called me weird, so I started cussing it out in English, British English, Redneckology, American Slang and Ebonics.
I do believe that the cats think the recliner is a trampoline because all day they were jumping back and forth on it & constantly knocking off the ash tray on Jen L Graves lap & kept knocking her mouse onto the floor. This of course irritated Jen, shit, it would irritate me to if the ash tray got dumped in my lap & if the mouse kept getting thrown on the floor.
Who the hell would want to be sane? They don't prescribe drugs for that!
Psycho is just another way of saying "adorable with knives". And oh how I do love my knife collection.
STAGES OF INSANITY:
1. Talks to self
2. Argues with self
3. Loses argument with self
4. Is no longer talking with self
Yep I have gone through all these stages and when I am done with number 4 I move on and
1. Have a conversation with my cats
2. Arguing with the cats
3. Losing an argument with the cats
4. No longer having a conversation with the cats.
I have multiple personalities, can you figure out which one I am right now?
The voices in my head were arguing again, they been arguing all day, so I told them that if they didn't shut up I was gonna shove cotton balls in my ears.
Sometimes things are better left unsaid, sometimes it is better not to talk about some things. Of course I am not sure I know what those things that should be left unsaid are sometimes. And sometimes it is better not to talk about some things but some times I don't know what those things are. BUT, sometimes I do know what things should be left unsaid & I know when it is better not to talk about some things.
is busy zoning out. please leave a brief message & one of my personalities will get back to you as soon as possible. thanks again & have a great day! BEEEEEEEEP
Just for the record, I would NEVER hide anything from my girlfriend Jen L Graves. I tell her EVERYTHING & I plan on telling her anything & everything. I have no secrets from her & never have.
Some things I just don't like talking about. Some things are in the past & I don't like bringing them up. Some things are just better left in the past. Just saying.
I'm now kind of in a blah mood. Yeah blah.
Time for me to leave the world of Facebook for awhile. I need a break from it before my head explodes.
And then I got off Facebook. I figured it was time to get off of Facebook. I wasn’t exactly done posting messages and being my crazy self but my mood had totally got ruined by a certain someone. And then other things made it worse. Now I’m not in my crazy, funny, insane kind of mood anymore. My mood got totally ruined real quick. I tried not to let it be ruined but well, I lost that battle for sure. Oh well. It got ruined anyway. Well, now at this point I feel like I have caused problems. OR, no no no I got it, maybe “I” am the problem. I mean, the problems did finally leave, and they were thought to be gone, but then a whole bunch more problems took their place. This is probably because I am the problem. Yeah, maybe I am the problem.
May 24th Ramblings Of A Crazy Insomniac
I'm back Facebook. I figured I would get back on here. I have nothing else to do. No one else to talk to or ramble too. SO, maybe I will post status messages, maybe not. Not sure I really have anything to say right now. Hum, that might be a first for me.
Don't threaten me with a trip to the psych ward, they give you free drugs and a pretty white coat that makes you hug yourself... sounds good to me, how bout you?
May 24th started at 12am & it didn't start off bad at all. Everything was going good & pretty much normal except for me being my normal crazy self but come 4:30am or 5am everything suddenly went downhill & this day became completely shitty.
Crazy people don't know they are crazy, I know I am crazy so therefore I am not crazy, Isn't that crazy? Yeah, that is just crazy.
I've lost my mind. I know it's around here somewhere but to be completely honest I'm not looking for it terribly hard. Finding it would do me no good right now anyway.
I am running from the men in the white coats, who insist i escaped a facility. I don't know why I am running from them, they will probably give me that nice comfy jacket that lets me hug myself.
I'm glad there's music playing right now because if I had to sit in silence I would go crazy, or I would drive myself crazy. In which case, I would do either 2 things. I would go to sleep OR I would say fuck it & I would leave the house. Glad I am not having to sit in silence right now because I would totally go crazy. Even though I am kind of sitting in silence. You are sitting in silence if no one is talking.
There is a fine line between genius and insanity. I am not quite a genius and not quite insane so I must be very smart or very crazy
My imaginary friends had a talk with the voices in my head, who consulted with the dead people who follow me, they have agreed that we don't like you!!!!!!!!!!
People make fun of me for being crazy, they're just jealous because the voices in my head talk to me & not them & they are jealous they don't have dead people following them around & they are jealous they don't have imaginary friends.
It's a beautiful day, I think I'll skip my meds and stir things up a bit. Oh wait, I already have. I am always causing "PROBLEMS". Well, guess I have always been a troublemaker. LOL. OR, I could be the "PROBLEM". Oh well, I have already stirred things up for today. Guess my work is done here.
If someone has MULTIPLE PERSONALITIES and their SUICIDAL, wouldn't it be considered as a HOSTAGE SITUATION?
Something tells me that this day isn't going to go as planned. Hum. I could be wrong but I doubt it. Yep, I think plans for the day have completely changed. Oh well, I can find something to get into I'm sure.
It's time to raise your glass to the loony, crazy people in your life that with their actions make you look sane.
Oh yeah, I just noticed. I am now sitting in complete silence. Oh I feel it coming on. Yep, I will definitely go insane or drive myself crazy. I see me going out of the house very shortly or in the near future.
The key to a HAPPY life is focusing your attention on the things you love, imagining you already have what you desire and being truly grateful for what you have
I got out of the house. That definitely helped. This day might not be so bad after all. As long as I don't fall asleep or anything. I can't be sleeping the day away. Fuck that.
Seriously, how the hell is my puppy Bella STILL hyper? She has been hyper ALL night, literally. And she has been running around all over the place with our cat Lilly. They are best buds & like to play but good lord, there is a time to finally calm down. They don't know when that time is though. I think its never, well, really, it is never.
IF YOU HAVE A SISTER WHO HAS MADE YOU LAUGH, STUCK UP FOR YOU, DROVE YOU CRAZY, HUGGED YOU, WATCHED YOU SUCCEED, SAW YOU FAIL, PICKED YOU BACK UP, CHEERED YOU ON, MADE YOU STRONG, AND IS SOMEONE YOU CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT & SOMEONE YOU CAN ALWAYS COUNT ON...... RE-POST THIS IF YOU HAVE A SISTER YOU LOVE! ♥
Did ya ever meet those people that make ya think ..You're just a fun little lollipop triple-dipped in psycho, aren't ya? I'm one of those people. I don't mind being one of those people, I am proud to be one of those people.
I'm not insane!!! I am voluntarily indifferent to conventional rationality. Besides, I like being mentally unbalanced, mentally challenged, and mentally unstable sometimes. At least I know I'm not normal, I'm a whole lot more fun.
I have been awake for 2 days. I've had insomnia & haven't been tired & just haven't felt like going to sleep. Yeah, I'm hyper right now.
WARNING 2 NEW FRIENDS: I have bipolar, ADHD, Paranoid Schizophrenia, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, Borderline Personality Disorder, & Schizophrenia, so I'm a lil crazy, a lil insane, sometimes mentally unbalanced & mentally unstable & I post crazy statuses. After knowing all that now, you can decide whether you still want to be on my friends list. If not, then feel free to delete me. I don't care. Your choice.
WARNING 2 NEWLY ACCEPTED FRIENDS: I post a LOT of status messages. If this bothers you then feel free to delete me. If you get annoyed by all my statuses in your news feed then you can either hide my posts or feel free to delete me. Just thought I would warn you now because I'm currently in the mood to post status messages. You've been warned. So be prepared.
Oh BTW, if you don't like anything I say or anything I post then feel free to delete me that way it saves me time from deleting you. This is MY Facebook & I will write what I want when I want. Also if you don't like my opinions then once again, feel free to delete me.
I think after today my amount of friends just might go down. Especially after the amount of status messages I'm going to post. LOL. I'm in a status message posting kind of mood. If this bothers you, well, you know what to do. DELETE! But oh well, I don't care. You either love me or hate me, it is your choice. I've been this way my whole life. I've always been pretty much crazy & a little off my rocker.
By the way, some of the stuff I post might not make any sense to you but hey, sometimes I don't always make sense.
I keep forgetting that sometimes I'm walking on egg shells around some people. Damn, I got to remember that. It keeps slipping my mind. Shit, half the time I can't remember anything anyway.
Unicorns and Glitter!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Who doesn't love unicorns and glitter? Shiiiiit.
The other day we had a bad thunderstorm. It was pouring down rain. And it was thundering all loud but I loved it because I love the sound of thunder. To me that sound is soothing & calming & relaxing, at least to me it is. I just love thunderstorms & its even better when its lightning too.
The other day when we had the bad thunderstorm I was hoping that the electricity didn't go out but you know it, of course it did. It went out for like a minute & came back on but don't you know it fucked up our internet. Thank God the internet was only down for like 5 minutes. I would probably die without the internet.
If yall haven't heard of the website Listia then you should totally check it out. You get free stuff on the website & you can give away free stuff you don't want. Everything is FREE. You can get some really fucking cool stuff on that site. Almost anything that you can imagine is on Listia. http://www.listia.com/
Give & Get Free Stuff - Listia.com Auctions
Listia is an auction site for Free Stuff where you bid on other people's items using credits instead of real money. We make it easy for users to get rid of stuff they don't need anymore and find stuff they want for free. Listia is a marketplace where people enjoy giving and getting items for free.
On Listia you get credits & the more credits you have the more free stuff you can get. You can earn credits in so many different ways, by listing an auction, by commenting on auctions, by linking your Facebook & Twitter accounts & more. Seriously go check out the website http://www.listia.com/
Give & Get Free Stuff - Listia.com Auctions
Listia is an auction site for Free Stuff where you bid on other people's items using credits instead of real money. We make it easy for users to get rid of stuff they don't need anymore and find stuff they want for free. Listia is a marketplace where people enjoy giving and getting items for free.
Yes, if you are asking yourself have I been up all night and not been to sleep then the answer is yes. I am not the only one though. Jen L Graves has been awake all night too. LOL. Sometimes we just don't sleep because we are not tired.
If a friend lies to me, I don't like it, but it doesn't mean I'm going 2 stop bein their friend. I give people chances. If they lie to me once I give them another chance, lie 2 me twice & I just might rethink our friendship. All friendships have fights & issues & if the friendship is strong enough or worth fighting for then you get over it & don't hold grudges & you forgive.
I'm NOT 2 faced, never will b. If I got somethin 2 say I say it 2 ur face, not behind ur back. If u don't like the way I am or how I handle my friendships then u dont have 2 b my friend. Im not goin 2 stop bein some1's friend jus cos you stopped bein their friend. Thats not how I work. So if u have a problem wit that, u can take ur bullshit else where cos Im not dealin wit it!!!!
I hate being rushed. I try to get my shit straight before I walk out the door. Normally this doesn't happen cos I always forget something. I hope I can start getting it all together before I walk out the door because I hate being rushed out the door. I don't like being rushed with anything I do. I hate being rushed, so warning, don't ever try to rush me!!!
I hate wasting time. The past couple weeks I had been wasting my time and wasting time doing things. Don't want to waste my time anymore. I got too much to do to waste my time doing things that don't need to be done. And I end up wasting my time on things that don't need to be done. It has gotten a little better though. Not as bad as it was, I think I'm getting better. Thank God cos I hate wasting time.
Everything happens for a reason but sometimes I wonder what the reason is for some things that happen.
Why aren't some things in my life going the way I want them to? Why can't things go right for me the way I want them too? Damnit. Maybe this is some kind of punishment for something I have done. Who knows. Maybe this is karma. I hope not. Because Karma taking revenge on you is always a bad thing & ends up really biting you in the ass.
Damn, I'm all hyper today & wound up. And in a talkative mood & in a status message posting kind of mood. Lol. Can u tell? Lol
I took a slight break from status message posting as I left the house to go get some stuff. But I am back now. Oh yeah, I bet yall are just so happy to hear that. LOL.
Today started off good then ended up getting bad, hoped it would get better. Didn't think it would. But it has definitely gotten better. I am back in my happy place now.
I will go ahead & admit it, sometimes I jump to conclusions. I shouldn't, but I do. Sorry. Just how I am. One of my faults I guess. I will try my hardest not to jump to conclusions. I said I will try, can't guarantee anything. I doubt I will achieve this but all I can do is try.
I will always explain myself & my actions, well, almost always. Sometimes I don't need to explain myself or my actions, they should be self explanatory. However, there is a reason for everything I do, almost always a reason for everything that I do, that I can think of. Yeah, almost always. Can't think of a time there wasn't a reason for something I did. Um, yeah, don't think there has been a time.
Sometimes it takes awhile to realize who your true friends are. Those are the ones who always stick by you. The ones who are always there for you. The ones who listen to what you have to say & give advice. The ones who always stick up for you & have your back. True friends don't ignore you & they don't stop talking to you & they don't act like you don't exist. That is my definition anyway.
Sometimes you might think I ask too many questions. I'm sorry if I do this around you & it annoys you. Obviously I ask questions because I want to know the answer. If I ask you questions its because I think you're smart & know the answer to my question. And that's my explanation to why I ask so many questions.
I wonder about people, I question their motives. I wished people were as blunt & as honest as me. If you're my friend, I ask for honesty. Is that too much to ask? I don't think so. I think every friend wants honesty in a friendship. If you're my friend, be honest, even if it upsets me, hurts me or pisses me off. If you're a true friend & our friendship is important enough & strong enough then we can work through it.
If you got something to say about me then have the balls & say it to my face. Don't go talk shit behind my back because I'll eventually find out, I almost always do. Just say it to my face, speak your mind.
Got something to say about me, then say it to my face. Don't act like you're talking about someone else when you're really talking about me because I'm not stupid, I know you're talking about me. Say it to my face. I won't get mad. I like people who speak their mind & say it to my face, this shows me you're not a coward.
I've been thinking about a lot lately. Lots of things have been running through my mind. Not bad things. Just thinking about different things that I haven't taken the time to really think about before. Glad I have had the time recently to think about these things.
I think in a way I am kind of addicted to Listia. I love this website. I think I might be addicted. LOL. Maybe not as addicted as Jen L Graves. LOL. Just kidding baby. Its a fun website. Just like Ebay but a whole lot better & all items on Listia are FREE!!!! http://www.listia.com/
Give & Get Free Stuff - Listia.com Auctions
Listia is an auction site for Free Stuff where you bid on other people's items using credits instead of real money. We make it easy for users to get rid of stuff they don't need anymore and find stuff they want for free. Listia is a marketplace where people enjoy giving and getting items for free.
YOU DON'T LOOK SICK!!! No I don't. It's hard to explain to someone when they have no clue. It's a daily struggle feeling sick on the inside while you look fine on the outside. Please put this as your status if you or someone you know has an invisible illness (Anxiety, Bi-Polar, P.T.S.D., LUPUS, Fibromyalgia, Crohns, Diabetes, Arthritis, Chronic Back Pain, Epilepsy, MS, Depression, Schizophrenia). Don't Judge!
I have been very talkative lately. All I want to do is talk because I have lots to say. I have been talking non stop at certain times. Not to mention the fact that I have been posting a million status messages. Its just because I have a lot to say. I've just been way too talkative. LOL.
Honestly, I stopped caring what people thought about me. I didn't really care before what people thought about me & I definitely don't care now what people think of me. With that said, if you read any of my statuses & think I'm crazy then, I just might be crazy. Of course, that would be your opinion. You can think what you want about me. I'm not exactly crazy but I'm not exactly normal either.
I had a conversation with my cat, only to stop to realize what I was doing. I stopped myself cos I realized I was having a conversation with my cat like I would have with an actual person. I thought I actually had lost it. At the time, I didn't think it seemed very normal to have a conversation with a cat. But now, I think maybe it is normal to talk to your cat, even if you are having a conversation with it. LOL.
I hate some of the FB Event invites I get. I read ALL the info on the events. Some info just absolutely makes no sense at all. Words in the info are misspelled or they have improper grammar. Anyone who creates a FB Event needs to seriously read the info they write to make sure it makes sense & they need to check their grammar & spelling before posting the event. Its not that hard, pretty simple really.
I have not slept since I don't know when and I don't plan on sleeping any time soon at all. I am not one bit tired, I am not even close to being tired, not even a little bit, not even the slightest bit.
I always end up having such a problem wording things right & correctly by my standards. This sucks for me because that means when I'm writing something it takes me so much longer to actually put all the words together & in the right place. That's why it takes me so long to reply to comments. That & the fact that I end up writing a book.
Damn, seriously some things take me way too long to do. Even though they shouldn't take me as long as they do.
A friend sent me a forwarded text message that said the world is supposed to end on May 21st. Wow, really? That's the first I had heard about it. Well, sorry that is incorrect because the world hasn't ended & I'm still alive.
Does anyone know why everyone was talking about the world ending on May 21st? Who all of a sudden said that the world was going to end on May 21st? Was it on the news or something? And why was the world supposed to end on May 21st? I've always heard that the world is going to end in 2012. Does anyone know the answer to this or know where I can find out the answer to this? I'm just curious is all.
5 DEADLY TERMS USED BY A WOMAN :
(1) FINE -this is the word women use to end an argument when they know they are RIGHT & YOU need to SHUT UP.
(2) NOTHING -means SOMETHING & u need to be WORRIED
(3) GO AHEAD -this is a dare not permission DO NOT DO IT.
(4) WHATEVER -is a woman's way of saying F**K YOU.
(5) THAT'S OK -she is thinking long & hard on HOW & WHEN you will pay for your mistake.
Did I ever mention how much I dislike the Westboro Baptist Church? YES, I dislike them. They're a church that teaches & spreads hate. They even teach their children to hate & have their children singing songs titled "God Hates The World". Children as young as 1 & 2 years old are being taught to hate. If you learn more about them you will think they are much like a cult. I see them as a cult.
I could go on forever about Westboro Baptist Church. I've done research on them. Even though they're a church, they're very much like a cult. I've done LOTS of research on them & watched many YouTube videos about them. Before I knew what they were all about, they interested me so I did research on them. But now that I know what they are all about & what they stand for, I have come to dislike the group.
I'll probably be putting up more items for auction on my Listia profile. Go check out what I got up for auction & bid on them if you're interested & want them. I auction everything from t-shirts to baseball cards to DVDS to tools & much much more. All the items I put up for auction are FREE!! http://www.listia.com/profile/447567
Give & Get Free Stuff - Listia.com Auctions
Listia is an auction site for Free Stuff where you bid on other people's items using credits instead of real money. We make it easy for users to get rid of stuff they don't need anymore and find stuff they want for free. Listia is a marketplace where people enjoy giving and getting items for free.
Flooding seems to be the big problem for many people all around the United States. I must say that I am actually glad that our area hasn't gotten any flooding. We have gotten rain but not any flooding that I know of. I feel bad for those people across the US that have gotten flooding though.
I see the soul as the center of my existence.
I posted blogs on Jen L Graves Blogger about items she had listed for auction onListia. Trying to help her get more credits. Not every item of her's is shown on Blogger, only a couple items so you could get an idea of what kind of stuff she has up for auction. http://msjengraves-jensblog.blogspot.com/
msjengraves-jensblog.blogspot.com
Jen L Graves & I have been up for 2 days. We're both cranky & irritable. Our animals are working our last nerves. They're either running all over the house, fighting, or getting into something. Jen & I have very little patience right now. They've been like this since last night. We just want them to calm down & take a break. I hope they do settle down eventually.
I would like to note that the status message about me & Jen L Graves not sleeping for 2 days took me more then 5 minutes to write. I had a hard time wording it right & I had a hard time putting the words in the right place & I kept going back & re-reading it to make sure it sounded right. This irritates the shit out of me. It shouldn't take like 10 minutes to write a status message. Ugh.
I just wanted to say that I love Jen L Graves so very much, even if she doesn't always believe me when I tell her. She means so very much to me. I wish I could show her how much she means to me & how much I love her. I hope one day she realizes how much I love her & how much she means to me. She is my everything, my world, my reason for existence.
And, for the record, NO, Jen L Graves & I have not yet been to sleep. Don't feel like going to sleep. We have been up for like 2 days or something. It all started off with insomnia & after that it seems that insomnia never disappeared.
If you're asking yourself if I have gone to sleep yet then the answer is NO. I have not been to sleep at all. Been up for like 2 days or something. Got to love insomnia, of course until it makes you become delirious. I have not gotten to that point yet, I don't think.
9 out of 10 voices in my head say i am insane, the tenth is having a case of ADHD & isn't quite paying attention because it is too busy arguing with the dead people that follow me around.
The evil demons under my bed argued with the monsters in my closet until the voices in my head made them stop...WHAT A NIGHT
I think I would know if i was insane! My cats would have told me by now if I was. They tell me everything you know. I talk to them a lot. I talk to them when I have no one else to talk to. I have conversations with them to. Here's a secret: They actually talk back to me. They don't think I'm insane, they told me so.
Slight irregularities in my personality are NOT to be considered flaws, but show that I am hand-made & of the highest quality. Yes I'm a little weirder, stranger, & mentally unbalanced then most but I like to just say I am unique and special.
Yes, I talk to myself...YES, I answer myself...Yes, I might be insane, BUT, at least my answers are NEVER wrong! And thankfully, I have never gotten in an argument with myself. I am already confused enough & if I got in an argument with myself I would be even more confused, not to mention the headache I would have.
Tried to go to my happy place earlier but ended up having a case of Adhd & I got totally distracted then forgot what I was doing & then ended up getting lost and ended up here on Facebook. Oh well at least yall know me here.
i'm insane in the membrane Jen L Graves
I went to apply for a job at a mental asylum & they told me I have to spend 5 hours with a crazy person. I told them that I've spent 30 years with myself & don't you know, they handed me an application to fill out & asked when I'd like to do an interview.
OK, let me get something straight here ... You're calling me crazy, mentally challenged, mentally unstable, insane, & mentally unbalanced like it's a BAD THING?
I'm sitting in a corner watching my imaginary friends fight the shadows on the wall. I do believe my imaginary friends won cos they've stabbed to death the shadows on the wall because blood is dripping down the wall. Ohhhh how exciting, I love blood and gore.
Okay call me crazy, mentally unstable, insane, mad, mentally challenged, off my rocker, & mentally unbalanced if you want but if you don't stop I'm going to send the dead people that follow me & my imaginary friends after you to teach you a lesson. They have very sharp knives & they like to stab people. You SHOULD be scared, you will be scared after they get a hold of you!!
4 out of 5 voices are telling me to do it. The other one is yelling at me in German! Just because my dad was born in Ulm, Germany does not mean that I can speak German or understand German. Damn you voice, speak in ENGLISH!!!
Well today was another hard day, my imaginary friends were running with very long sharp knives towards the dead people that follow me who had machetes & they started stabbing each other & of course blood & guts went all over the place & the voices in my head were fighting with themselves & I just couldn't get no peace & quiet, & I'm still missing my helmet & crayons.
One of the voices called me weird, so I started cussing at in German. This surprised me. I didn't even know I spoke German.
I'm medicated for your protection & safety!!!!!
Psycho is just another way of saying "adorable with knives". And oh how I do love my knife collection. I like to stab things. My favorite thing to stab is my voodoo doll.
STAGES OF INSANITY:
1. Talks to self
2. Argues with self
3. Loses argument with self
4. Is no longer talking with self
Hummmm, I do all these things now. I'm currently going through the stages of insanity.
The voices in my head were arguing again, they been arguing all day, so I told them that if they didn't shut the hell up & give me some peace & quiet that I was gonna shove cotton balls in my ears so I couldn't hear them anymore.
I'm not insane!!! I am voluntarily indifferent to conventional rationality. Besides, I like being mentally unbalanced, mentally challenged, and mentally unstable sometimes. At least I know I'm not normal, I'm a whole lot more fun.
Okay, maybe I'm done posting status messages. Well, really, when am I ever really done posting status messages? I haven't slept in days, I am hyper & I've had lots of Mountain Dew, tons of caffeine & sugar all day long. LOL. I am talking non stop & just can't seem to shut up. LOL. But I don't want to shut up anyway, I have lots to say.
You know, I was thinking about it & I should come up with my own status shuffle because I come up with way better status messages then they have on there & my status messages are way more entertaining & more realistic & more true.
All the status messages I posted were all true by the way. I DO hear voices & dead people DO actually follow me around. Kind of scary isn't it? LOL. Hey what can I say? I have Schizophrenia, I'm bound to be a little crazy & insane.
I've been neglecting Listia all day, so its time to click over to the tab at the top of my screen that has Listia on it & see what's going on over there. I'm sure I'll have tons of emails & comments. This means I'm taking a break from posting statuses. Damn, I thought I just heard people cheering. Maybe I'm hearing things or it could be the voices in my head arguing again.