May 18th In The World Of Bean

Well the craziness of Bean all started around 12am. So enjoy reading my crazy thoughts and random posts from Facebook. I had been awake for a couple days with no sleep and I was hyper and talkative and had lots on my mind and just felt like blowing up my Facebook with status messages. LOL.

Unicorns and Glitter!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Who doesn't love unicorns and glitter? Shiiiiit.

It is like reeeeeeeeeeeeeeallllllly fucking raining right now. I hear it pouring down raining right now. Holy fuck. Annnnnnnnnnnd it is thundering because I hear the thunder. Its probably lightening but I ain't looking outside, no thanks.

awww Lilly Bean is licking my hand, she is such a sweet little kitty. I love her. I've missed her laying on my lap. And Shandi is laying with me too. Awwwwww.

Reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeallly fucking hope the electricity don't fucking go out right now because I don't have my lantern. Even though I do have candles but candles don't light up the room like a lantern does and a lantern don't really cause a fire like candles do. Damnnnnn. I hate this weather.

I'm hoping my battery on my laptop lasts for awhile since I had to unplug it because of this damn storm we are having.

Jen L Graves
Angela Bean... Let's see if you get this quote, right " All that typing, is giving me a headache. " LMMFAO !!

Now that I have blown up Jen L Graves Facebook with long ass comments that look like I am writing a novel I am going to go back to what I was doing before I was doing that. LOL.

On to the next task at hand that will keep me busy & that is to update my descriptions for my auctions on Listia. LOL. This should keep me busy for the next couple hours. LOL. See ya later Facebook. LOL. I'll be back soon I'm sure, but not too soon.

Finished updating my auctions. Thank goodness. Boy that took awhile. LOL. Not quite as long as I had thought but anyways. I am done with it. Thank goodness.

Holy shit, one of my auctions got up to 606 credits. Hell yes. Definitely going to make sure that item gets sent out as fast as I can get it out. Definitely worth 606 credits, even though I never would have thought it would be. Hell yes. Total score. Woot woot. LOL.

Jen L Graves
Insomnia: When ones body is so tired it forgets how to sleep. ( I just think my body is mad at me! ) Yup that's it alright. They say no rest for the wicked... And me and Angela Bean are definitely WICKED !! HAHA

Yes, if you are asking yourself have I been up all night and not been to sleep then the answer is yes. I am not the only one though. My baby Jen L Graves has been awake all night too. LOL. Sometimes we just don't sleep because we are not tired.

Jen L Graves
Bout to roll out with Angela Bean and Dawn Corbin !!

Just because someone lies about stuff doesn't mean I am going to stop being there friend. I give people chances. I don't just stop being there friend. All friendships have fights and issues and normally if the friendship is strong enough you get over it & don't hold grudges.

Just for yall's info, I am NOT two faced & never will be. If I got to something to say I say it to your face. I am not a two faced person. I am who I am. If you don't like the way I am and how I handle things then you don't have to be my friend. I know the truth and thats all that matters. Don't matter what you say.

I so have to pee but I can't because I have my cat Lilly on my lap. I have had to pee for about an hour but I so don't want to move her. She is so cute sleeping on me. Cute little kitty. LOL.

I hate being rushed so I hope when I leave I have my shit together which normally I don't cos I always forget something but I hope I have my shit together cos I hate being rushed out the door. I should probably get my shit straight before it gets closer to the time to leave that way I'm not rushing. I don't feel like getting up though. LOL.

Is it not just fucking gross that my puppy likes to chew on used tampons? Isn't that fucking gross. Ewwwwwwwwwwww. I have no idea why she does this. I have no clue. I'm lost at why she does that. Who knows. Either way, its freaking gross. Yuck.

So many things have gone wrong so far today. This day began bad, it seems to be getting better. Thank goodness.

We had such a busy day today. I didn't want to waste time. I've been wasting my time lately and wasting time doing things. Don't want to waste my time anymore. I got too much to do to waste my time doing things that don't need to be done.

I'm proud of Jen L Graves for saving money. I'm so proud of her. Its easier for her to save money than it is for me. I'm bad about spending money. I think I've been doing better though, I think. Probably not.

Everything happens for a reason but sometimes I wonder what the reason is for some things that happen.

So many things happening all at once. Hard to keep up and remember everything. My brain is on overload. Lol.

I feel bad because I'm so broke. I should be able to provide 4 Jen L Graves. I feel like a bad gf. I should be able to give her what she wants. I suck. Must try harder.

I have been trying hard 2 get a job. I have, but I must try harder. I feel like I'm not trying hard enough. Must bust my ass and try harder. I can do it. I need & have to do it.

Must get my shit straight and together. I'm slacking with my responsibilities and my duties. Must get it together & do better & try harder to do things. I have been sick & just haven't had the energy really to do anything. Must get it together.

I've been letting things go & not doing things I should be doing. I feel bad. Not fair to Jen L Graves. Must get off my lazy ass & get shit done. Haven't had the energy & I've been sick. But I have to get things done, I must. Need to make myself do things.

Sometimes I feel like I'm not a good girlfriend to Jen L Graves. I feel like I could be a better girlfriend to her & provide for her more. Even though I been trying hard to get a job & to provide for her. I feel like I'm not trying hard enough. I must do better. I must. I must get a job so we can have more money. I must. Don't want to lose her ever.

So today Jennifer & I almost rear ended a tractor trailor cos he decided he was goin 2 pull on the side of the road on an on ramp. fucking idiot.

So busy today. Glad we got it all done. Hope I didn't irritate Jen L Graves today. I was just so hyper. LOL. I think it was okay. Because Jen was hyper too. LOL. I love her when she is hyper. She is so cute when she is hyper & she seriously cracks me the hell up.

Being broke sucks. I need to bust my ass tonite & apply for jobs. There has 2 b a job out there 4 me. Not having a job is irritating me & aggravating me damnit.

Coming to realize more & more that I'm broke. I was made aware of this today. And I keep being made aware of this. It sucks. It really does suck to be broke. Life just has to get better than this. It must. It must for us to survive.

Startn 2 think bout "friends" on my friend list & startn 2 ? some things. They don't talk 2 me & they r friends wit my wife. So, I'm questioning whether 2 keep them on my friend list or not.

Wondering if some of my "friends" on my friends list r true friends or not. R they 2 faced or backstabbers or like 2 gossip? I don't know I'm wondering. Really wondering now.

Those of u who don't comment or poke me or talk 2 me on FB might seriously get deleted. I have been thinkin & ppl mite get deleted. Unsure of my true "friends" on FB. don't know anymore.

If u want 2 stay on my friends list then u need 2 start talkin 2 me. I don't need "friends" on my FB that I'm unsure of r true friends. Mite start deleting people. Sorry. Just unsure lately who's my true friend.

Don't worry, u won't get deleted if u talk to me on the phone or if u text me. I'll only delete those who don't talk 2 me at all.

Seriously was irritated with my phone earlier. I could have thrown it damnit. Wish I could afford a new phone. I love my Blackberry but it is so old, it is time for a new one.

Why aren't some things in my life going the way I want them to? Why can't things go right for me? Damnit. Maybe this is some kind of punishment for something I have done. Who knows. Maybe this is karma. I hope not. Because if it is then this sucks big time.

Seriously felt like I was goin 2 have a panic attack earlier. I had 2 smoke a cigarette 2 calm down. I let things stress me too easily. Dumb things really. Things that wouldn't normally stress anyone else. Too many things been going through my head lately. Just so much going on really. Life is super freaking busy kind of.

I love hearing Jen L Graves sing. She has such a beautiful voice. Mmm. Sexy voice. Best sound I've heard. God I love her. I am glad she sings in front of me. I love hearing her sing.

Jen L Graves looks so hot today. At least I think she does. Damn, yeah, she is a hottie. I love her so much. Yeah, my gf is a hottie. Even if she thinks her hair is a mess today, she still looks hot to me. I actually think she looks hot with her hair a mess. I love her so much. She is so beautiful in my eyes.

Damn, I'm all hyper today & wound up. Lol. Can u tell? Lol

Today started off bad, hoped it would get better. Didn't think it would. Seems like it just might get better and not be such a bad day after all.

Me and Jen L Graves were riding back from Harrisonburg earlier. Jen was hyper and so was I. We haven't slept yet lol. We have been hyper all day. Haha

So wish I had my damn video camera earlier so I could have recorded Jen L Graves. She was seriously cracking me the hell up in the car. ROFL LMMFAO...haha I thought I was going to die laughing at her. Hahaha

‎Jen L Graves was singing and bouncing around and driving at the same time, she was cracking me up. She looked all gangster. Haha. U would die laughing at her if you would have seen her. Lmmfao. I so love my girlfriend. She makes me laugh. Haha

Yes I'm hyper and have had lots of mt dew and no sleep. I have been hyper all day. I am just sitting here relaxing and chilling now. I was way more hyper earlier. LOL. And so was Jen L Graves. We are not as hyper as we were earlier. LOL. We have calmed down a little bit. LOL.

I screwed myself with shipping costs. I charged $2 shipping for a tshirt & I put it in smallest envelope I could get it in & it ended up costing me like $7+. I know better now. I screwed myself, my fault. Glad I changed all my auctions to Exact Shipping instead of putting in an amount. Sorry Jen L Graves, my mistake that cost us. I am sorry baby.

I will say it again & say it for the last time, sometimes I jump to conclusions. I shouldn't, but I do. Sorry. Just how I am. One of my faults I guess. I will try my hardest next time not to jump to conclusions. I said I will try, can't guarantee anything.

I will always explain myself and my actions, well, almost always. Sometimes I don't need to explain myself or my actions, they should be self explanatory. However, there is a reason for everything I do, almost always a reason for everything that I do, that I can think of. Yeah, almost always. Can't think of a time there wasn't a reason for something I did. Um, yeah, don't think there has been a time.

Been in a pretty good mood all day. Didn't start off exactly in a good mood. Things just kept going wrong. And then they only seemed to get worse. BUT, I am in a pretty good mood right now. Things seem to have gotten better. I better not jinx myself though. I am just hoping nothing else goes wrong today. One can hope & pray.

When I said I was thinking about deleting people, I didn't mean the people who like my statuses or the people who comment my statuses or who email me or chat with me on Facebook or the ones who text my cell phone or call my cell phone. Basically the people who are my "friends" that I am unsure of if they are my true friends.

Sometimes it takes awhile to realize who your true friends are. Those are the ones who always stick by you. The ones who are always there for you. The ones who listen to what you have to say & give advice. The ones who always stick up for you & have your back. True friends don't ignore you & they don't stop talking to you & they don't act like you don't exist. That is my definition anyway.

Sometimes you might think I ask too many questions. I'm sorry if I do this around you & it annoys you. Obviously I ask questions because I want to know the answer. If I ask you questions its because I think you're smart & know the answer to my question. Best I can explain it I suppose.

Sometimes I seriously wonder about people, I question their motives. I just wish people were as blunt as me & as honest as me. If you are my friend, all I ask is you be honest with me. Is that too much to ask? I don't think so. Just be honest, even if it might upset me or hurt me or piss me off. If you are a true friend then we can work through it.

If you got something to say about me then just say it to me. If you think something about me then just tell me. Don't go talk shit behind my back. I will eventually find out, I almost always do. Just come out & say it to me. Don't make it like you are talking about someone else when you are really talking about me. Say it to my face, I won't get mad. I like honesty and I hate liars.

I've been thinking about a lot of things today. Lots of things have been running through my mind. Not bad things, just thinking about different things that I haven't taken the time to really think about before. Glad I have had the time today to think about these things. Makes things clearer to me now, or so it seems.

If people don't want to hear their dog whine and are going to be mean to their dog when it whines and yell at it when it whines then they shouldn't have gotten a dog in the first place. Some people shouldn't own animals, seriously.

Sometimes I don't listen or hear what people say, and this gets me into trouble sometimes or only causes me problems later on. Jen L Graves I am very sorry I wasn't listening to what you were saying baby. I am so sorry. Please forgive me. Another one of my mistakes today. I'm making too many today. I'm sorry baby.

I am totally new to the Listia community & have now realized that I screwed myself because I listed no free shipping on my auctions yet on some of them I am going to have to pay shipping because I listed the wrong shipping cost. I listed the shipping cost too low, so now I really am in a way paying for free shipping. Even though they send me money for the shipping its not enough. You live & you learn.

In a way, I am kind of addicted to Listia. Its this website where you can give away free items & get free items. Some items you have to pay shipping costs but some items are free shipping. I totally love this website. I think I might be addicted. LOL. Its a fun website. Kind of like Ebay but a whole lot better.

I am absolutely, totally, positively in love with Jen L Graves. She is my life, my world. She means everything to me & I love her so very much.

All day I couldn't help but look at Jen L Graves. She looks absolutely hot, gorgeous, sexy, and beautiful today. I couldn't stop staring at her and here it is 9:42pm and I still can't stop staring at her because she is so beautiful and such a hottie. I totally love my girlfriend. I am so lucky to have her.

You know why I am so slow today? Because I keep getting distracted. You know how I am distracted? All day I have been constantly staring at my girlfriend Jen L Graves because she looks absolutely beautiful and amazing.

YOU DON'T LOOK SICK!!! No I don't. It's hard to explain to someone when they have no clue. It's a daily struggle feeling sick on the inside while you look fine on the outside. Please put this as your status for at least 1 hour if you or someone you know has an invisible illness (Anxiety, Bi-Polar, P.T.S.D., LUPUS, Fibromyalgia, Crohns, Diabetes, Arthritis, Chronic Back Pain, Epilepsy, MS, Depression). Don't Judge!

Faline Jordan
What is great is when you have three Sisters (Jen L Graves Angela Bean andKourtney Landes) that you can talk about anything with and they respect you more than your own blood sister does.. I love each and every one of yall. Thank you for being great sisters

YOU DON'T LOOK SICK!!! No I don't. It's hard to explain to someone when they have no clue. It's a daily struggle feeling sick on the inside while you look fine on the outside. Please put this as your status if you or someone you know has an invisible illness (Anxiety, Bi-Polar, P.T.S.D., LUPUS, Fibromyalgia, Crohns, Diabetes, Arthritis, Chronic Back Pain, Epilepsy, MS, Depression, Schizophrenia). Don't Judge!