Longing

They hand me my life in a syringe
Have a nice day
They say
As they shove the money in their pockets
Satisfied because they got all they wanted
Don't think they all say just do it
If you choose not to decide, you still have made a choice
A choice that if we choose to make could possibly end our life
The razor dances across my skin
As I stare at it
So very tempting
Over
Rest
My heart still beats
Chills run up and down my spine
A ball of bones and blood
The walls breathe
Locked in a cage
Filled inside with so much rage
Robbing the air of oxygen that I breathe
Drowning slowly in a pool of my own blood
Slipping into the darkness
As I just fall deeper and deeper
Do it! The voices inside my head tell me
don’t!
Angel and devil
Who's who?
What do I do?
What do I want?
What should I do?
I'm so lost
Pain
That's all I can feel
Stop
No
I want to live
I need to die
That's all they say
In my mind
Let me sleep
Because I'm already numb
Too numb to feel
The addiction has control over my life
I don't know how to stop it
Just leave me alone
Torment
Sweat
Tears
As I cry goodbye
Night
Darkness surrounds me now